What Next?

I was looking at my blog trying to work out how I changed the layout for something more personal when I read the comment under the title 'The story of me and what life has thrown at me good and bad and where I go from here' - Mmh I thought - that's the question, where do I go from here? Truly I have no idea. I am still recovering from the stroke, unable to drive (yet) and still wobbly and a bit dizzy but able to sit behind a computer all day if I have to! Until I am fit and well again, or at least as well as I am going to be, which could in reality take years rather than months for all I know, I will just have to wait and think and dream about what may or may not happen to me. It is said that people make their own luck. Well, I'm not so sure cos I certainly have tried, believe me. But back to 'where I go from here'. My ambition is to travel. I devour the programmes on the telly which show you far off places which you know in your heart you are never going to get to. However, there are a lot of very accessible places now, lots of them off the beaten track and and available to those who have the drive and of course, not forgetting, the money. I have the drive!
Strangely enough money is not at the top of my list, it's second. A companion to go travelling with is at the top. I have a very good, lifelong friend who lives in Denmark. We are of a similar age, have similar baggage and similar tastes. We both want to travel. She has been to many countries in the world already, either luxurious or not. She is always a possibility.
A great book for the would be traveller is 1001 Natural Wonders You Must See Before You Die by Michael Bright.

I have ticked off about 20!!
Well back to work for me, but it's nice to dream.

Something to Write About

The days can be long here even though I am working from home 2 days per week. Because I cannot drive, I have to rely on others to take me 'out' for the day. One such friend is Denise who runs a farming contract and very busy livery yard with her husband, about 7 miles away. She bought a beautiful cottage in the tiny, undisturbed village of Alwinton, north Northumberland which she lets out during the year to paying guests. You can visit the cottage at http://www.fellsidecottcheviots.co.uk/index.html Alwinton is the most awe inspiring area with its peaceful, lazy attitude to life and is well worth a visit, especially if you love walking. I travelled up there with her on Saturday so she could tidy and change the beds for her next incoming couple but I also had another reason for going. Recently, she had discovered a red squirrel had been visiting her garden and I was looking forward to trying to catch a glimpse of this shy creature. Denise took along a feeding box and some feed which for once, was especially designed for red squirrels and not their insidious cousins that are relentlessly creeping north. The garden is a delight with its many shrubs and the red squirrel feeder was quickly attached to a tree along with the bird feeder. Many birds visited that day - robin, dunnock, sparrow, blackbird, blue tit, coal tit, great tit and in the field pigeons, herons, and crows. Although I sat in the dining room watching intently for the red squirrel I was to be disappointed but Denise walked into the room and saw a glimpse of red tail disappearing into the foliage. I had been thwarted but the neighbours confirmed that the red had been seen running along the fence on several occasions. I guess Denise has to add 'red squirrel sightings possible' to her website now.
Apart from a lovely day at the cottage, the countryside around was spectacular with the trees changing colour, especially beech trees which range from vivid yellow to a glorious orange.
Meanwhile back at home, I was thrilled to see a robin in my garden on two occasions today. I had a visit a few weeks ago on the one and only miniature conifer I have in the front garden, but the robin's visit was fleeting. Today it had a short feed before being scared off by something. I have had the usual starlings and sparrows along with a blue tit and collared doves but am now hoping the robin will continue to call. It may not seem so special to many people but it is many many years since I had a robin in the garden so, despite 5 cats and a small dog, I don't think I am doing too bad!

Birthday and Butterflies

Well yesterday was my birthday and I reached 57! So hard to believe that I am on my way to 60 but due to recent events I am really glad I got here. All I have to do now is get better and I do seem to be improving all the time. I am hoping to start doing some work from home next week so please keep sending your sightings of red squirrels wherever you live and grey ones if you live in the greater north east regions, particularly Northumberland and Cumbria. http://www.saveoursquirrels.org/sightings/index.html
I guess I had better change my profile now!
A last note about my buddleja is that I counted 7 butterflies on it a day or so ago which consisted of Red Admirals and Peacocks. Including Large White and Tortoiseshell, I have had 4 varietes which is one less than my neighbour. The flower spikes are all but finished with a few small ones near the base. We've had so much rain the last few days that I do not think I will see so many butterflies now but roll on next year.

Success at Last.

Over the past few days my neighbours buddleja has diminished somewhat although I still counted 8 butterflies. My rather smaller one has started to blossom in earnest and at last has had some butterflies on it! I have seen large white, red admirals and peacocks plus some very large bees, a wasp and various other insects. The purple one continues to die off without an insect in sight!

My advice to anyone wanting an 'instant' wildlife garden is to invest in a Buddleja davidii White Profusion.

http://www.crocus.co.uk/plants/_/shrubs/buddleja-davidii-white-profusion/itemno.PL00000890/

A Bright Start.

Sunshine makes you feel better, that is unless of course, you've suffered a stroke and then you feel sorry that you cant just get your bits and bobs and go out somewhere! However I try to stay positive and have 'signed' up to starting some specific exercises which I hope will help my progress. Anyway, the sun shone brilliantly and I took my breakfast outside to savour it after the heavy rainfall that we had to endure most of yesterday. Funny how the weather should affect your moods! A couple of years ago I planted a purple buddleia in the hope of enticing some butterflies. Maybe butterflies do not like purple as the results were pretty disastrous and virtually no butterflies ever landed. I did as the book said and trimmed the stalks so they would flower at different heights but all to no avail. Then my neighbour planted a small 'white' buddleia which quickly grew until it peered over my fence. The spikes of white flowers have continued to grow an develop and today I was stunned to count 10 butterflies on the plant from my side. I have counted 5 different varieties in all, large white, red admiral, peacock, tortoiseshell and comma. Apart from butterflies, bees and other insects enjoy the plant.
Obviously I rushed out last year and bought myself a white species which is doing well. It has the flowers all in place but they are not out yet. My neighbour's buddleia still has some flowers on but they are turning now and I can't wait until all the butterflies are busy taking nectar from my plant.

Buddleia showing Tortoiseshell, Peacock, Red Admiral, Large White and some very interested bees!

Better Late Than Never

Just before I was taken ill, a pair of blue tits had frequented my garden daily. I wasn't sure if they were going to nest in one of my boxes, but the male constantly attacked his 'rival' on my french doors. He would flit about on the outside chair and attack an imaginary rival he could see in my windows. Not wanting the bird to injure itselft, I moved the chairs away from the window, only to watch it land continuosly on the door handle and continue battling with the window. Not content with the window, he would fly from my apple tree to my plum tree and attack himself in the shed window and then fly back again. I was almost convinced that he would find another box for himself and his partner but as my daughter later told me, he definitely used my brown box above the french doors Unfortunately I knew nothing of this until I returned home. It was rather annoying to think I had boxes up for several years and the blue tits chose this year to nest! Unlike the house martins who are now onto there second clutch, the blue tits only seem to have had one and then flew off. I have no evidence to support the fledgling of the young but a great deal of hope!

The male blue tit attacking his rival!

A Day Out

The weather has been reasonable and lately I have been feeling that I would like to get out a bit more so with this in mind, my lovely nephew and grandson said he would take me to a local bird hide. He is a bit biased as he is a very keen birdwatcher and photographer. Typically, it looked rather grey so cameras were abandoned and two pairs of binoculars set out in the now pouring rain with more than a little optimism. We headed to Thornley Woodland Centre which has a good hide with usually, an abundance of the more common birds with a few surprises. We were not disappointed as the rain stotted down. The place is an absolute magnet for bullfinches and we saw 1 male and 2 females on one of the many table feeders. Blue, great and coal tits flitted about along with several robins including 2 young with brown streaks on their heads. We were pleased to see a young jay land in the shelter of a tree, out of the persistent rain and then fly to the nearest table to gorge itself on the many nuts and seeds placed there. When I felt sure, it's crop must have been well filled, it decided to settle down and at several points. it looked as if it were going to nodd off. Not clever as a sparrowhawk swept down from a nearby tree and glided effortlessly into trees slightly further away. Neither the sparrowhawk saw the jay nor did the jay show any signs of panic as it sat calmly with it's back to the sparrowhawk. I was pulled both ways, to either watch the possible excitement of watching the hawk swoop down and carry off this charming little bird or do what I have never done before and chase the jay away before it came to harm! Fortunately for the jay, the hawk seemed to have flown away so we left the jay snoozing! Two other jays appeared but they diddn't seem at all perturbed by the youngster and ignored it. My nephew became a little excited when he caught a brief glimpse of a willow warbler and although we waited a while, we didn't get a clear view of it although he discovered that it had been recorded in the book a few days ago. After watching the cheeky and ubiquitous grey squirrels (it's not a red area sadly), we then went off to Far Pastures which is only a couple of miles further south.
The rain did not stop and we held out little hope at we never sen much here. The site is regularly visited by the http://www.gatesheadbirders.co.uk/ who seem to see so many species. However, apart from a heron that hides in the bull rushes and the odd swan and moorhen, we have never had too much luck. As we entered the hide our first reaction was much the same until my observant nephew noticed a kingfisher resting to the left of the hide. For the next hour, we watched this most beautiful of birds fly from left to right and then back again until I was dizzy and started to see in double vision again. Although the kingfisher was not too near, it certainly was a great sighting of such an elusive, shy bird. However, we were right about the other birds although we did see a lone mallard and have distant vies of a couple of swallows and a pinpoint red kite - http://www.northernkites.org.uk/.
We travelled the 20 odd miles home enjoying blue skies an warm sunshine!!

Beyond My Control

I am sorry that I have not written in my blog as much as I would have liked to but I have had a life changing experience. On the 16th May I suffered a mild stoke and on the 17th May a more significant one. I am a little vague over the details but after going to A & E at 3am on the 16th, I was sent to the Intensive Care Unit at the General Hospital and was placed onto a ventilator. I stayed there for about a week and then to the High Dependency Unit until I finally went to ward 33 where I made a little progress. After a week or so, I was transferred back to North Tyneside Hospital to ward 22 which is the stroke rehabilitation ward were much more significant progress was made. After almost 13 days, I was gratefully allowed home on what they call a "facilitated discharge" which meant nurses, physio's and occupational therapists started with 3 visits a day down to 1 visit 3 times a week and eventually no visits at all.

I have not wanted to hear any of the details about my condition throughout my illness but lately, my curiosity is making a comeback and I have been asking questions and receiving some rather uncomfortable answers.

The reasons for a stroke are many and varied and a conclusive reason cannot always be given. However, I am fairly sure of the reasons that may have contributed to me being suddenly struck down by this most devastating affliction. My previous post mentioned a small dog, a Chihuahua which at the time was a few weeks short of being one year old. She is my daughter's dog and I was dog sitting for a few weeks. I never wanted a dog least of all a 'soft' Chihuahua but I have to admit that I was rather besotted by her. To cut of some very unpleasant details, she was attacked by a Staffordshire Bull Terrier that appeared from nowhere and I ended up on the floor grappling with this excuse for a dog. This, I think, may have been the cause or at least a contributing factor and the consultant had the same idea.

Anyway, small dog survived and so did I although I think my scars may be greater and last longer!

I am eternally grateful to everyone who cared for me but some people stand out. They are my 2 daughters who must have suffered hell when I was ill and no one really knew if I would pull though. And also to my other family and friends (one came all the way from the Bahamas) and workmates, all of whom have visited me in and out of hospital. Work have been great and I cannot wait to get back to those red squirrels although, alas that may take a little while longer.

There is no promise to write each day but I will write sometimes. I sorely miss going out to the Dene and other places to see my beloved birds and other wildlife so don't have as much to say. Maybe I will get around to adding those photos I meant to!

A Day off Work

Initially written on the 8th May.
Picked the right day to be off as the sun has shone brilliantly all day long. Took 'the small dog' out for a walk in the Dene and stupidly didn't take my binoculars with me. The birds were singing their hearts out and without trying I saw great spotted woodpecker, goldfinch, blackbird, blue and great tits, wood pigeons, robin, crow, collared dove, housesparrow, swift and housemartin and mistle thrush. I heard a chiff chaff and woodwarbler. The 'west' end of the dene is sorely neglected by the local authority as opposed to the 'east' end. Trial and mountain bikes have killed off all forms of vegetation, there is litter everywhere and the burn itself is blocked at one point with driftwood, bottles, old bike parts, and general rubbish. I intend to write to the council and ask them what they are planning to do about it. All councils have a duty to increase biodiversity and this is hardly achieving that. The Dene is a gem and should be given priority but as usual, the local authority seem to fail to see what's under their nose!

Monday 5th May

Very excited as my friends the Housemartins are back from their long journey from Africa. They don't nest on my house but on a neighbours and they have been visiting the same nest for at least 4 years. I know that Summer is not too far away when they arrive with the promise of at least a few sunny days. I love to sit and watch them and am always amazed by how they zoom onto the nest without any hesitation. They usually have 2 broods and sometimes there can be 6 of them all on the nest at the same time. The nest is the usual cup shape but this one has two cups. My bluetits are still here but seems to have decided to nest somewhere other than the boxes I have. I was very hopeful for a week or two, when they were flying from the apple tree up to the box to inspect it but it seems that it is not their des res sadly. They both still come to visit every day and the female sits and flicks here wings in a most provocative way which makes the male dash to the feeder and bring back a morsel to feed her with. He is forever attacking himself against the french doors or the hut window. I used to worry in case he stunned himself as I could here him banging against the window even when I was in another room. Starlings have nested again as usual in the eves of the house and I am fairly certain some house sparrows are in a tree a couple of doors down. They too visit the garden feeder most days along with some other 'common' birds although a pair of goldfinches have dropped in a couple of times recently.

International Dawn Chorus Day 4th May

I woke at 4am on a rather damp and grey morning and by 4:30 was on my way to Hauxley Nature Reserve in Northumberland to help with International Dawn Chorus Day. The drive was uneventful until I spotted a barn owl just before the entrance to Druridge Bay Country Park and then another less that a quarter of a mile further on. I slowed my car and drove parallel with the owl as it skimmed the hedgerow looking for breakfast. Amazing! About 20 people turned up and were lucky enough to hear a variety of birds from blackbirds to whitethroats followed by a rather nice breakfast supplied and cooked fresh by The Fenton Centre. Expert in bird song Geoff Sample rounded off the day with a short talk. Two firsts for me that day on the lake was a Scaup and a Pink Footed Goose. Mmh no camera!

A Start

Where to start is the question and why bother anyway? A combination of reasons. I enjoy using my computer and surfing the web. I enjoy recording my thoughts and what I get up to. A diary, whether it's a paper one with a fluffy pink cover or an electronic one, it doesn't matter. What matters is putting it all down in words. Words that others can see, even if they are not truly interested. The purpose is to make me think not others. I have looked into my distant past and searched out my predecessors. I have found out their names and birthdays, their occupations and addresses. This has given me a small insight into their daily lives. But what of their thoughts? I have no idea. I can only guess. I know they worked hard and some of them couldn't read or write but what they felt, I can never know. I want my children to know and understand me and how I think and feel and although I talk to them, even if they are not that interested at the moment, putting these thoughts down in words on paper (metaphorically speaking), they can 'listen' to me when they want to and not when I want to talk. Mmh getting a bit heavy! Well, it's my first time after all and I am not too sure what I am going to put here, but this is a start to find that wild heart a home.

A bit more

Firstly the name for my blog is the title of a John Denver song http://www.john-denver.org/Default.asp?id=18 great lyrics. I thought the title very appropriate and I can identify with the words too. Sadly I lost my husband in 1996, quite suddenly. One moment he was here and the next gone. We have two incredible children, girls. They were quite young at the time and since that terrible day, my pride in them has grown. They are both well balanced, caring individuals, who are strong and self-reliant. Would they have been this way had their father survived as they grew up? Who knows. All I know is that their father would have been (is) very proud of them both. They are individuals and like most siblings, not at all like each other but both have qualities that makes them - well - them. The youngest is presently working in London and due to start university in September. The eldest has just moved back home for a while and is working full time near the Metro Centre. We currently have 5 cats, 1 dog and a goldfish. I never wanted quite so many pets but somehow they just sort of happened. 4 of the cats are moggies ranging from pure black to almost pure white with some tabby patches and the 5th is a Persian, all fur coat and no knickers type of cat. The goldfish speaks for itself.
I have listed wildlife and photography as some of my interests, nay passions. I plan to have plenty of input in these areas. So what next? Read on.